It was a typical Tuesday night. We got home from my son's hockey practice and in his typical way he wanted to put his gear to dry by himself. Normally I am very proud of this desire and hey, as long as it gets dry, who cares right? So I let him take 20 minutes to do something that would take me about 2 and I went to start dinner. I made dinner and went to the garage to check on him. He still wasn't done. I was tired and hungry and I wanted to eat. I said "Hurry up would you, dinner is waiting." Then, if my husband had been home he would have told me to chill out, it wasn't as important as my son finishing the job he had started. But my husband wasn't home so I reached out to help my son. This is where my three year old showed that he has the maturity of someone ten times his age and I need to think before I act. He said, "Mom, just go eat, I got this." Can you blame me, sometimes I forget he's only three?
Wednesday, September 26, 2012
Monday, September 17, 2012
Odd Monday
Letely I find that I'm logging on to my blog not to blog, but to check on what my brother is doing. This might be odd to some people, but I find that I am very excited about his life right now. Not that I want my life to change, I happen to like things the way they are thanks, but I am so excited for him. Also, his life is reminding me that I was there just a few short years ago, well not there specifically but there in my life. My oldest is only 7 and it was only a 8 years ago that I was starting a new job and moving into a new house and all that stress and excitement and over emotion were mine to freak out about. It's so much fun, stress, excitement, fear, unknown, and anxiousness rolled into a big sleepless, tired jumble. That's what I was feeling and I know that he's feeling the same, more, and different things too. So, I log on to check what he is doing, how he is feeling, how things are working and I forget that my life is happening here too and maybe someone might wonder how we are. We are fine, by the way. Anyone who knows my brother can wish him well right now and think about what he is starting and feeling and let him know you wish him well.
As for my children, they are so excited about all that he is doing that they ask almost every hour to see him and see where he is. I think we will be going on a road trip to visit soon, luckily he is moving a bit closer to us.
We did not do any school today, we played all day. We played we were on a raft in the Amazon that turned into a boat when my oldest heard that there were snakes that lived in the river. We played that we were princes and princesses stuck in a castle hiding from a fire-breathing dragon. We played that we were fairy princesses that built nests for baby birds that lost their parents. We played that we were capturing bad dinosaurs to save the good ones from being eaten. We played that we were searching for lost treasure in a cave so that we could send it to our family in the new world (we were studying the early colonies). Let's just say it's been an odd day.
As for my children, they are so excited about all that he is doing that they ask almost every hour to see him and see where he is. I think we will be going on a road trip to visit soon, luckily he is moving a bit closer to us.
We did not do any school today, we played all day. We played we were on a raft in the Amazon that turned into a boat when my oldest heard that there were snakes that lived in the river. We played that we were princes and princesses stuck in a castle hiding from a fire-breathing dragon. We played that we were fairy princesses that built nests for baby birds that lost their parents. We played that we were capturing bad dinosaurs to save the good ones from being eaten. We played that we were searching for lost treasure in a cave so that we could send it to our family in the new world (we were studying the early colonies). Let's just say it's been an odd day.
Saturday, September 15, 2012
Differences between my girls and my boys
First, let me point out that my girls are older and my youngest son is only 5 months old. Now that you know the basics let me share some things I've noticed before but were very apparent today.
1. When my girls fall or bump into something they typically cry or whimper. When my sons fall or bump into something they say "I'm ok!" or they get angry at the thing that had the audacity to be in their way.
2. When you tell my daughters that their feet smell or that they are dirty they get sad. When you tell my son he laughs and says "yeah!"
3. Two words, bodily functions, enough said.
4. Food for my daughters must be decided on and inspected, my son just eats it, lots of it.
5. Play time for the girls is a story of pretend land with everyone in their proper places. They like to have an elaborate scene for all their activities. My sons, we can count both of them here, like to have cars, hit things, throw things, and generally move around. If you give my boys a ball or a puck then they are happy for a long while.
6. The girls like to domesticate outside. They make tea parties out of rocks and sticks become plates or beds. My son just likes to hit things with a stick.
7. My son steps on cockroaches, my girls squeal and run.
8. My girls turn everything into a fairy accessory. My son turns everything into a weapon.
9. My son likes to see cars on the road, my girls look at who is driving them.
10. Sound effects and theme songs, my boys have them, my girls do not.
1. When my girls fall or bump into something they typically cry or whimper. When my sons fall or bump into something they say "I'm ok!" or they get angry at the thing that had the audacity to be in their way.
2. When you tell my daughters that their feet smell or that they are dirty they get sad. When you tell my son he laughs and says "yeah!"
3. Two words, bodily functions, enough said.
4. Food for my daughters must be decided on and inspected, my son just eats it, lots of it.
5. Play time for the girls is a story of pretend land with everyone in their proper places. They like to have an elaborate scene for all their activities. My sons, we can count both of them here, like to have cars, hit things, throw things, and generally move around. If you give my boys a ball or a puck then they are happy for a long while.
6. The girls like to domesticate outside. They make tea parties out of rocks and sticks become plates or beds. My son just likes to hit things with a stick.
7. My son steps on cockroaches, my girls squeal and run.
8. My girls turn everything into a fairy accessory. My son turns everything into a weapon.
9. My son likes to see cars on the road, my girls look at who is driving them.
10. Sound effects and theme songs, my boys have them, my girls do not.
Sunday, September 9, 2012
Things My Children Are Teaching Me
Tonight I tried to go to the grocery store by myself. I thought it would be faster and after explaining that I was only going to buy a few things and then come back I expected to get in the car and leave the house. I was stopped by my 5 year old and my 3 year old asking politely if they could join me on my trip. I tried again to explain that it would be faster if I went by myself. My son, the 3 year old, explained to me that if I went without help it would actually take longer than if they went with me because I might forget something. I agreed with his logic and took the two of them to the store. It was an enjoyable trip and he was right, shopping with two helpers was much easier than shopping with four and more fun than shopping alone. Although I think I ended up buying more food than I would have without them; it was hard to say no to the ripe avocados. The trip got me thinking about all the things I have learned from my children. Some things I am sure my children have tried to teach me, like how helpful they are, but a few I'm sure they have no idea they've taught me. Here's what I came up with:
1. Take time to listen, someone else might have a valid point you haven't considered.
2. Change can be tons of fun and your plan was probably lame anyway.
3. You have very little control over what happens to you and around you, but if you have a stuffed giraffe it's way easier to react happily.
4. It's ok to laugh out loud even if it's only a little funny.
5. When you get tired, fall asleep, it really doesn't matter where you are; someone who loves you will take care of you.
6. It's ok to say "I love you" to people.
7. If you are having an argument and you can get the other person to laugh, you win.
8. Every white surface is just waiting to have color added.
9. Help whenever you can, don't wait until you have the needed skills, just try, you might get points for effort.
10. Sticks are cool. They can be swords, umbrellas, paintbrushes, spoons, cars, trains, flowers, pencils, and fish just to name a few.
1. Take time to listen, someone else might have a valid point you haven't considered.
2. Change can be tons of fun and your plan was probably lame anyway.
3. You have very little control over what happens to you and around you, but if you have a stuffed giraffe it's way easier to react happily.
4. It's ok to laugh out loud even if it's only a little funny.
5. When you get tired, fall asleep, it really doesn't matter where you are; someone who loves you will take care of you.
6. It's ok to say "I love you" to people.
7. If you are having an argument and you can get the other person to laugh, you win.
8. Every white surface is just waiting to have color added.
9. Help whenever you can, don't wait until you have the needed skills, just try, you might get points for effort.
10. Sticks are cool. They can be swords, umbrellas, paintbrushes, spoons, cars, trains, flowers, pencils, and fish just to name a few.
Saturday, September 8, 2012
10 Questions to ask to check if someone cares about you.
Sometimes we all wonder if we are loved, or if indeed anyone listens or cares what we say. Here are some questions to ask if you wonder how your friends and family feel about you. These are all questions my children have asked me this week. I think they ask to check if I'm listening or to ascertain whether I like them as much as they perceive that I like the other children.
1. If you were a mosquito, would you bite me?
2. If you were a dog, would you wag your tail and bark when I got home, or just bark?
3. Do you like me better than your toys?
4. Do you think I'm prettier than my headband?
5. Does my armpit smell funny?
6. Did you like my story that I didn't tell you yet?
7. If I made you a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for lunch and I used the wrong jelly would you eat it anyway to make me feel good?
8. Would you let me drive your car when I'm a teenager?
9. Can I share your tea?
10. If you knew the answer would you tell me?
1. If you were a mosquito, would you bite me?
2. If you were a dog, would you wag your tail and bark when I got home, or just bark?
3. Do you like me better than your toys?
4. Do you think I'm prettier than my headband?
5. Does my armpit smell funny?
6. Did you like my story that I didn't tell you yet?
7. If I made you a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for lunch and I used the wrong jelly would you eat it anyway to make me feel good?
8. Would you let me drive your car when I'm a teenager?
9. Can I share your tea?
10. If you knew the answer would you tell me?
Monday, September 3, 2012
10 things I'm doing "wrong" as a parent
This is inspired by some awesome parents I know who have lately been concerned about some of their shortcuts and other actions that they feel would not be appreciated by past generations. Here are some parenting things I do that would make one of my great-grandmothers laugh and some of her generation quite upset...
1. Breakfast for dinner. Some mornings you get up and make a wonderful hot breakfast for your family to start the day off right. Then some days you get around to that more toward the end of the day, probably because you started thinking about dinner around half an hour after everyone was "starving". This is good and healthy, it's called a memory.
2. Bath night happens sometimes. I am not saying that my children are unhealthy and filthy, they just aren't regularly soaped and scrubbed. Sometimes we just go to bed with a bit of earth between our toes. I used to worry about this, but lately I've decided that some things are more important.
3. I have no schedule for household chores. My grandmother always did/does laundry on Monday. She gets it all done on one day and she's all organized and ain't that special. I just toss a load in when I can and sometimes I remember to dry it and sometimes it gets folded and put away, so go me. I almost always do a load on Monday, does that count?
4. I let my children go days without changing out of their pjs. I know it's scandalous, but sometimes they don't actually get dressed. In fact sometimes my son wears only his underwear only all day long. This mostly happens in the summer, in the winter he gets cold and wears a hockey jersey with his underwear.
5. I let my children watch cartoons on Saturday morning. I just can't help it. Some of my best memories with my brother were watching cartoons and I want my children to have that too. Besides, how else would I have time to make them pancakes so we can have leftover pancakes for dinner?
6. I laugh at my children. Sometimes this is my only defense. I try hard not to laugh if they think they are hurt. Like tonight when my 5 year old was so tired she couldn't actually get in bed and I kept putting her in bed and she kept getting out to tell me something. I said "aren't you tired?" she actually yawned as she said, "no mom, not at all." I had to laugh, I had no other response.
7. I let my children dress themselves. This is actually my favorite. I love watching my children express themselves through pink shirts, purple shorts and vest, and red cowboy boots. This lets them feel confident and helps them learn to make decisions. I also secretly love shopping with spiderman, a pirate princess, and a cowgirl. My husband is sometimes mortified and embarrassed by what they choose, but if they are mostly dressed for the weather I say they look marvelous!
8. My children do not have a bedtime. Oh, they always go to bed between 5pm and midnight, I am very strict about that. I love home schooling for this reason. I don't like to have to wake my children up every morning or force them to stop doing something fun just to go to bed.
9. I let my children talk, and I actually listen to them. I do not subscribe to the "children should be seen and not heard." I find that my children say the most amusing things, but you have to listen to them in order to hear those things. I let my children guide the dinner conversation and I encourage them to tell me stories at bedtime. I love the stories they make up and I enjoy hearing what they remember from the day.
10. I let my children talk to strangers. I am convinced that a person they've never met is almost never a threat. I'm not saying that it's not possible, but I also don't want them to be afraid of people or the world in general. I don't teach them stranger danger. I teach them to be wary of odd people, or things that seem out of the ordinary. We often talk about "is that reasonable or normal?"
So, if you think you are a bad parent, or something you think is fine is something someone else says is wrong, maybe my "wrongs" will help you see that if you love your children and you are trying to do a good job, then you probably are doing just fine.
1. Breakfast for dinner. Some mornings you get up and make a wonderful hot breakfast for your family to start the day off right. Then some days you get around to that more toward the end of the day, probably because you started thinking about dinner around half an hour after everyone was "starving". This is good and healthy, it's called a memory.
2. Bath night happens sometimes. I am not saying that my children are unhealthy and filthy, they just aren't regularly soaped and scrubbed. Sometimes we just go to bed with a bit of earth between our toes. I used to worry about this, but lately I've decided that some things are more important.
3. I have no schedule for household chores. My grandmother always did/does laundry on Monday. She gets it all done on one day and she's all organized and ain't that special. I just toss a load in when I can and sometimes I remember to dry it and sometimes it gets folded and put away, so go me. I almost always do a load on Monday, does that count?
4. I let my children go days without changing out of their pjs. I know it's scandalous, but sometimes they don't actually get dressed. In fact sometimes my son wears only his underwear only all day long. This mostly happens in the summer, in the winter he gets cold and wears a hockey jersey with his underwear.
5. I let my children watch cartoons on Saturday morning. I just can't help it. Some of my best memories with my brother were watching cartoons and I want my children to have that too. Besides, how else would I have time to make them pancakes so we can have leftover pancakes for dinner?
6. I laugh at my children. Sometimes this is my only defense. I try hard not to laugh if they think they are hurt. Like tonight when my 5 year old was so tired she couldn't actually get in bed and I kept putting her in bed and she kept getting out to tell me something. I said "aren't you tired?" she actually yawned as she said, "no mom, not at all." I had to laugh, I had no other response.
7. I let my children dress themselves. This is actually my favorite. I love watching my children express themselves through pink shirts, purple shorts and vest, and red cowboy boots. This lets them feel confident and helps them learn to make decisions. I also secretly love shopping with spiderman, a pirate princess, and a cowgirl. My husband is sometimes mortified and embarrassed by what they choose, but if they are mostly dressed for the weather I say they look marvelous!
8. My children do not have a bedtime. Oh, they always go to bed between 5pm and midnight, I am very strict about that. I love home schooling for this reason. I don't like to have to wake my children up every morning or force them to stop doing something fun just to go to bed.
9. I let my children talk, and I actually listen to them. I do not subscribe to the "children should be seen and not heard." I find that my children say the most amusing things, but you have to listen to them in order to hear those things. I let my children guide the dinner conversation and I encourage them to tell me stories at bedtime. I love the stories they make up and I enjoy hearing what they remember from the day.
10. I let my children talk to strangers. I am convinced that a person they've never met is almost never a threat. I'm not saying that it's not possible, but I also don't want them to be afraid of people or the world in general. I don't teach them stranger danger. I teach them to be wary of odd people, or things that seem out of the ordinary. We often talk about "is that reasonable or normal?"
So, if you think you are a bad parent, or something you think is fine is something someone else says is wrong, maybe my "wrongs" will help you see that if you love your children and you are trying to do a good job, then you probably are doing just fine.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)